Thursday, May 13, 2010

Hazel's Jokes!

RULES FOR PAWNS IN CHESS SOCIETY:

1. You are looked down upon by the rest of the pieces.

2. If you leave your home, you are not welcome back (unless you get to the end of the board and "disguise" yourself as another piece). In fact, other pieces want their space, sometimes motivating you to move two spaces away. They may scorn on you for moving only one.

3. If a piece blocks your way, you must wait until that piece decides to move. However, if you block a piece's way, they are allowed to capture you. This rule does not apply for those of your own colour or other pawns -- they will have mercy.

4. You are banned from the first rank of the board if you are white, or eighth rank if you are black (unless disguised).

5. On your "team", there are eight of you, but altogether worth less than the queen alone.

6. It is your responsibility to guard the king. If the king is attacked, you are often put to blame.

7. When you do get to the end of the board, you must conform to the standards of another piece. You can no longer remain yourself. I mean, who wants to be a pawn anyway?

Note: The wonderful comic at the top, and more, can be found at http://www.thechesscomic.com/
Check it out!